Jane Eyre Journal 3

      In chapter 15&16, Mr. Rochester held Jane’s hand after she saved his life from the fire. There was a special moment between them, something feelings were growing, but Mr. Rochester paused and Jane was too inexperienced to admit it—“the first taste of love”. She wished and feared to see Mr. Rochester the next day; however he was gone and left all those confusing and complicated feelings to her.

 Here is the interesting passage I chose to analyze（from Chapter 17 Page 166）--

“You have nothing to do with the master of Thornfield, further than to receive the salary he gives you for teaching his protégée, and to be grateful for such respectful and kind treatment as, if you do your duty, you have a right to expect at his hands. Be sure that is the only tie he seriously acknowledges between you and him: so don’t make him the object of your fine feelings, your raptures, agonies, and so forth. He is not of your order: keep to your caste; and be too self-respecting to lavish the love of the whole heart, soul, and strength, where such a gift is not wanted and would be despised.” 

        I think every girl who read this passage of Jane’s interior monologue would feel a blow on the heart, especially those who once bore a secret love for someone. This is Jane’s second time to say such harsh words to herself (the first time was in Chapter 16); this time was after Mr. Rochester’s leaving for ten days, she “was beginning to feel a strange chill and failing at the heart”.

 

      We can image how hurtful it is when Jane, who had no love experience and for the first in the life, felt a connection and warmness with someone, but couldn’t read and understand his feeling. She spent her restless night on thinking about those vague signs instead of seeing any actual respond, all she could do to stop this romantic despair, was ending up with a conclusion—it was an impossible and hopeless love. 

     To make this conclusion convincing, she had to be heartless to herself by using all kinds of reasons, by considering herself sentimental and foolish, by recognizing the reality and drawing a clean line between her and Mr. Rochester. These words let us see the tender part of a girl’s heart. — She didn’t degrade or blame Mr. Rochester but herself. From this, we can see her pure feeling for Mr. Rochester, and deep down inside, she did some inferiority complex when thinking about him, the man she started to fall in love.